People all over the world are experiencing the struggles of dealing with suicidal thoughts. The inner monologues of a suicidal person are long and stressful, and in our desire to find peace, we go to the Bible in search of answers. There are a handful of stories about suicide in the Bible, however, it does not delve deep into the thought process of the person.
What is the thought process of the person to make this irrevocable decision? I have my own experiences of suicidal thoughts and how I learned to deal with it. Here’s my story.
Thoughts of Suicide
“Kill yourself. You have no purpose.” Spoke an angry person who looked exactly like me. I woke up sweating profusely. It was another nightmare.
I silently prayed to God that these evil thoughts will depart from me in the name of Jesus. Gradually, my mind was enveloped with calming peace. I went back to sleep. I was no longer scared.
Like many people, I deal with these thoughts regularly. I am neither depressed nor diagnosed with any mental illness. I am quite well put together and I am genuinely happy.
I don’t blame people when they are shocked to know that yes, I deal with these thoughts too. Back then, these thoughts used to affect me, but today, not anymore.
Realization: Suicidal Thoughts are not Ours
One time, suicidal thoughts appeared, but instead of absorbing it, I just asked: “So if I kill myself, then what? I will never see God? or enjoy Jesus’ paradise? I will suffer in hell?”
And in a Socratic dialectic fashion, thoughts seemed to answer back: “Is it really a sin? Is there such a thing as hell?”
Then thoughts changed to a promise of “comfort”. “Imagine the feeling of being able to start over”. “Imagine the comfort when you end these sufferings”.
These thoughts run through my mind. I carefully examined these, sentence by sentence. Then it hit me… these words are not mine…. These words are of evil.
The arguments and promises sounded too familiar. It reminded me of the story of Jesus’ temptation in the Bible. The devil wanted Jesus to turn against God and these statements are just too similar to the devil’s arguments in Jesus’ story.
Why is suicide a sin in the Bible?
Evil is real and it wants us to go against God.
The devil is persistent. It will do anything to make us turn away from God. That is why evil is constantly working, planting deadly thoughts in peoples’ minds, and trying to get people to commit murder against themselves.
As the Bible warned:
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the …spiritual forces of evil.”
Ephesians 6:12
Understanding this turned my personal struggle into a spiritual battle. I now pray every time these thoughts appear. I just shrug it off because, I know, it is just evil desperately tempting me to turn against my God.
So I pause, close my eyes, and ask Jesus for protection. It works every single time. No evil thought can defeat me now. My God is stronger.
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”
1 Peter 5:8
How God’s Words Counter Thoughts of Suicide in the Bible
God knows how evil works. Evil will bombard you with the feeling of worthlessness so that you will resort to suicide. God counters these through Gospel stories, reminding us that we are loved unconditionally.
We have examples of forgiveness in the Bible, like the story of the prodigal son. So that we will be reminded that even if we feel we are irredeemable and worthless, God will still welcome us with arms wide open.
We are in the midst of a spiritual warfare. Suicide in the Bible is still a sin and the evil entities will do whatever it takes just to make us sin.
So be watchful. Jesus remained strong during His temptation in the desert and said NO to all of evil’s offers. And that, just like Jesus, we say no to evil.